Fixing boats in exotic locations is difficult even in the best conditions and with easy access. Without those things it's almost impossible says Lu Heikell

They say that the definition of cruising is ‘fixing your boat in exotic locations’. Well, crouched, sweating, in the aft heads using a head torch and a mirror to extract an ancient and recalcitrant tap unit from behind the wash basin, doesn’t seem that exotic to me. Yeah, I know, but look outside…

Seriously though, as I get that bit older and less flexible, everything just seems that bit more inaccessible. And boat builders also appear to take pride in making stuff tricky to get to. How many times have we had to ‘break’ something that is perfectly serviceable to access the broken thingummyjig?

On Seven-Tenths we had to take a jigsaw to immaculate half-inch thick teak panels in order to access the chainplates. It took me a long time to come to terms with having to do this sort of thing to fix stuff on a boat, but this was the worst by miles.

You think there must be a better way, but sadly sometimes there just isn’t – short of dismantling the entire boat’s interior furniture. You must just get on with it as best you can, and then patch up the collateral damage at your leisure.

How come a one-hour job takes five? In the cockpit we have a binnacle-mounted chart plotter in a smart white box. I had the bright idea of adding a couple of spotlights to the forward face of the box to give a bit more light to the cockpit table. Easy job? Well yes, and no.

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Find special tool to remove plotter? Tick. Drill out holes for spotlights in box? Tick. Power cables from cockpit light circuit to run up the steel pole of the binnacle? Tick. Make new access hole from steel pole to inside of box, as cables for plotter fill the existing hole. Hmm. Five hours, a new drill bit and drill battery recharged (twice), later. Job done!

So there I was in the aft heads, squatting in front of the wash basin cabinet – happily the doors are easily removed – using a mirror and torch to undo rusted nuts to release the tap unit. Of course you can’t actually see the fixings because the sink is in the way. And it takes a wee while to adjust to doing things in ‘reverse’, using the mirror to guide your spanner-wielding hands.

After a deal of swearing and a little brute force, the broken tap finally gave in. Three holes? Why three holes? Of course I couldn’t find a replacement tap with three holes. One hole is all you need these days, it seems. Except, of course, it isn’t the right-sized hole. Out comes the Dremel. Sorted.

And now to find different connectors for the new tap hoses. Out comes the plumbing spares kit. Luckily, we have appropriate spare connectors. I assume the position once more for the final fitting and to reconnect the water hoses – which one was the hot supply again? Now, what to cover the other two holes with? Oh, and I have to do the same thing for the tap in the forward heads… only, the cupboard barely allows access with two hands. Oh joy.

It’s true though, that once done, these trials are rewarded with a pretty decent spot for recovering, along with an appropriately named ‘Fix’ beer. The sense of satisfaction on being able to get a job done without recourse to others is good too. And unlike the UK this year, our Greek anchorage is warm and sunny and holds the promise of a cooling dip.


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