Fledgeling President considers zero carbon benefits

American President Barack Obama wants the carbon zero benefits of sailing taken into consideration when business grants are being doled out in a bid to strengthen the failing marine industry.

Speaker of the House of Representatives Nancy Pelosi said, “This will be not only good for the environment but for all my friends in the Bay Area who love sailing.”

Ms.Pelosi went on to say, “We also welcome the commercial partnerships between
companies as well.” Pelosi cited the newly announced joint marketing effort
between mast maker Southern Spars and the pharmaceutical company Pfizer,
makers of Viagra. The two companies have launched a new advertising campaign
targeted to the male sailing audience with their slogan; “A stiff rig is
hard to beat”. The first commercials are due to air during the next leg of the
Volvo Ocean Race.

Republican Ron Paul of Texas, said: “When you look at modern sailing yachts today, most of these vessels are fitted with carbon masts. How can this administration look us straight in the eye and say this package is focused on zero carbon when the masts are carbon? I don’t care if you put the carbon in the atmosphere or up in the sky in the form of a mast, it’s all the same carbon in my book.”