Yes, folks it was me

Running late for a flight from Gatwick to Split, Croatia, to test a boat on behalf of you, dear reader, my heart sank when my backpack having been disgorged from the X-Ray machine was hoicked to one side rather than shoved down the roller gantry towards me.

A stocky lady with a man’s haircut and military-style shirt asked me if I had anything sharp in the pockets.

‘No’

She then pulled out my YACHTING MONTHLY name badge with its fastening pin on the back.

‘Oh, fine you can keep that,’ I said.

‘That’s not what we’re looking for sir,’ she said and pulled out a four inch lock-knife I’d forgotten was still in my bag from a UK waters boat test.

‘It’s illegal to have such a knife on your person even in the UK.’ she said, ‘I’m going to have to call the police.’

I remonstrated but it was no use. Twenty minutes later the policeman arrived, and graciously accepted my explanation but said he would have to destroy the knife.

However I was not charged so I believe it is OK to carry such a knife if you have reason to…but definitely not to ‘smuggle’ it through airport security.

I apologised to the masculine woman for my involuntary expletive earlier and found her to be actually a lot more reasonable than her appearance had me believe.

I’m glad they ‘caught’ me as I would not want to be on a flight with a lunatic armed with such a knife.

By the way the flight was delayed and so I made it on time after all.